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Known for their gentle nature yet unusually high levels of intelligence, INFJs are one of the more rare types, for males especially. Seemingly always preoccupied with the weightiest emotional issues and concerns, embarking on a relationship with an INFJ seems like a dangerous proposition for any discerning INTJ. INFJs are characterized in this relationship pairing by their Introverted Intuition powered by Extraverted Feeling, which tends to drive them towards interpersonal interaction. They notice patterns unconsciously in the dynamics at play between people or within individual people. This deep shroud of mystery can prove irresistible for the problem-solver mind of the INTJ, and keep at bay the general ennui that creeps into most relationships over time. This leads them to view the world through a lens of utilitarianism, categorizing and interpreting the relationships between things and abstract ideas.

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This means that they both focus on intangible connections, abstract relationships, and connections between the unconscious and the environment. They are both seekers, exploring future implications and possibilities.

Together they search for grand patterns, themes, and the overall meaning of every situation they encounter.

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Long, intellectual discussions will highlight their relationship, and many a night will probably be spent reading books and discussing theories together. They both energize themselves by drawing inwards and exploring their inner thoughts and ideas. In their outer world they both prefer a certain amount of structure. They like having a plan for the day, knowing what to expect, and having closure on major decisions.

INFJ Flirting & Dating: How to Attract an INFJ

If both types are immersed in a theory or idea for the future they can completely ignore their organized plan and get lost in a bubble of theorizing and chasing down ideas and revelations. This means that both will get stressed by similar things and therefore be understanding and accommodating to each other.

Neither will like a lot of chaos and noise, both will focus more on the big-picture than details, and both will occasionally have moments of impulsive, possibly thrill-seeking behavior. After a week alone mulling over theories, they both may cast aside their books and go skydiving or rock climbing.

A well-balanced INFJ can bond deeply in a way that activates your dormant emotional side and help to bring a degree of balance to your life. By engaging meaningfully in your INTJ INFJ relationship you can connect with part of you that may have been long neglected.

Funnily enough, this can confuse them both because intuition is always trying to look beyond the concrete, yet inferior sensing wants to indulge in the concrete. They both are usually open to the other exploring their own interests, and they both like time to themselves and a certain amount of privacy. This relationship can be very invigorating to both partners because they enjoy meeting together over the same subjects, but are happy to quietly pursue their own independent interests as well, without pressure from the other to do everything together.

They almost never take anything at face value.

Female INFJ-Male INTJ Relationship

This can result in them both debating each other sometimes. Both types have a knack for envisioning a future goal and then working their way backward to figure out how to get there. When faced with a decision, INFJs will first consider what will maintain harmony, how people will be impacted, and what aligns with their values or ethics.

INTJs will first consider what is objective and logical, what the pros and cons are, and what has the best cause and effect. Feeling is inherently personal and thinking is inherently impersonal. Because of this divide in how both types approach decisions, there can be conflict when they both need to reach an agreement. They both also tend to be very stubborn about their views on things, so when they need to buckle down and come to an agreement they can both dig in their heels for a long time.

Usually how this ends in my observation is that INFJs eventually try to find a compromise. Their desire for harmony eventually leads them to look for a win-win situation.

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Over time, however, this can lead to resentment on the part of the INFJ. Both parties have a gift for seeing things from multiple perspectives. If they can use this gift to their advantage in decisions then less of these stand-offs will occur and the relationship will go more smoothly. INFJs in long-standing relationships want to be able to express their feelings on a regular basis.

They want to be transparent with their partner about how they feel. INTJs, in contrast, use a process called introverted feeling Fi. Tertiary Fi internalizes emotions and feelings and, as a result, INTJs are very private about these things.

They can also feel like they have no place to organize their feelings and sort them out externally. They may feel that their partner is uncaring or thoughtless or a bad listener.

They can get tired of being asked to share their feelings. Over time they can see the INFJ as intrusive or pushy in their efforts to draw out their emotions.

INTJs extravert their impersonal thoughts. They put them down in diagrams, charts, and in writing. INFJs extravert their personal thoughts and values. They need to either write about them or express them in some way. Often they will tell a trusted individual how they feel, or they analyze their choices and their impact on others.

They need to direct their people-centered analysis outwards.

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This function focuses on the objective, external world and is concerned with organizing systems and assigning all information into an external framework.

INTJs want to evaluate, decide, and complete tasks using a system of binary judgments. They want to structure and organize the external world, bring their intuitions into outer reality, and apply objective logic to guidelines, policies, and procedures. Introverted thinking applies objective logic to an inner framework, works through logical analysis inwardly, and seeks inner precision and accuracy.

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Inwardly they like to analyze, solve problems, categorize ideas, and find precise words to describe something. INFJs who use Ti can be quick to spot logical inconsistencies but less quick to recognize what is logically true.

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While both of these processes are good, and both are technically in the thinking realm, they both tend to clash with each other a little bit.

Te-users tend to see Ti-users as disorganized, inefficient, and too focused on evaluating to take action. Well, first we need to actually understand where the other person is coming from.

Recognize the gifts of the other individual. Healthy Extraverted Thinking is extremely efficient, productive, goal-oriented, and objective. Healthy Introverted Thinking is extremely analytical, precise, and principled in logic. Neither one is better or worse than the other. They can love someone tremendously and still point out errors in logic and they would be happy for someone else to point out if there is an error in their logic as well. INTJs can understand that when INFJs are processing something logically or trying to solve a problem, they will go inwards and try to solve it in a more private way.

INFJ-INFJ Relationships & Compatibility By Elaine Schallock, INFJ An INFJ sighting in the wild is rare enough; therefore, an INFJ-INFJ pairing would seem tantamount to myth - about as likely as catching a glimpse of a unicorn or a UFO or any other fictional "U"-named objects of folklore. Romantic Relationships "Love comes more naturally to the human heart than its opposite." Nelson Mandela. When it comes to romantic relationships, Advocates take the process of finding a partner seriously. Not ones for casual encounters, people with the Advocate personality type instead look for depth and meaning in their relationships. Jun 28,   INFJ Flirting & Dating: How to Attract an INFJ Each personality type has their own way of flirting and connecting with others. When it comes to romance not everyone approaches it the same or even shares the same relationship values. INFJs have a very unique approach to romantic entanglements, but they do value them very [ ].

INFJs, when provoked, tend to take on a morally righteous attitude. They can have power struggles and refuse to back down.

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Ask for help in coming up with an efficient plan of action. Do you agree or disagree with this article? Do you have any thoughts or insights to add? Let us know in the comments! Advocates will take the time necessary to find someone with whom they truly connect.

Infj and intj dating

Getting to that point can sometimes be a challenge for potential partners, especially if they are impatient types, as Advocates are often perfectionistic and picky.

Even worse is if their partner tries to resort to manipulation or lying, as Advocates will see right through it. All that being said, people with the Advocate personality type often have the advantage of desirability. Advocate personalities are enthusiastic in their relationships.

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There is a sense of wisdom behind their spontaneity, allowing them to pleasantly surprise their partners again and again. Advocates create a depth to their relationships that can hardly be described in conventional terms.

Jul 11,   The Strengths of the INFJ and INTJ Relationship. To start off, let's take a look at what INFJs and INTJs have in common. Both INFJs and INTJs have dominant Introverted Intuition. This means that they both focus on intangible connections, abstract relationships, and connections between the unconscious and the environment. I think INTJ/INFJ relationships should be left to highly mature and healthy people. I had a relationship as an INFJ with three different INTJs and they were each a bit of a nightmare by the end. My inability to feel secure in myself and their inability to see past their strong views didn't equal a healthy and growth-oriented relationship. INTJ's want a solid relationship that will stand the test of time. They like to be married and take their vows very seriously. They like to be married and take their vows very seriously. Now, once in a relationship, an INTJ is fiercely loyal.

Relationships with Advocates are not for the uncommitted or the shallow. When it comes to intimacy, Advocates look for a connection that goes beyond the physical.

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They prefer to embrace the emotional and even spiritual connection they have with their partners. People with this personality type are passionate partners. Advocates see intimacy as a way to express their love and to make their partners happy. They cherish not just the act of being in a relationship, but what it means to become one with another person in mind, body, and soul. Not a member yet?

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Personality Types Analysts. Intuitive N and Thinking T personality types, known for their rationality, impartiality, and intellectual excellence.

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